Thursday, October 31, 2013
Rejection--How my Rear End Met the Couch
I've had a rough couple days because of a very silly problem. That stinkin' R word--rejection. My manuscript got rejected by one of the agents I met at the conference. I've been sulking, I hate to admit. I've realized I'm not as thick-skinned as I should be. I know everyone deals with rejection at some point, be it with writing or relationships or anything you put your heart into. How do you handle it? My response was to sit on the couch with a bag of potato chips. Deplorable, I know. But really, what are some of your coping mechanisms in dealing with rejection? Leave me a comment and help me get my rear end off the couch!
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I learned a lot about rejection as a sales consultant. What helped me is that I took the emotion out of it by playing the "numbers game." By that, I mean that I didn't treat each individual rejection as a personal blow, but rather I went into the situation knowing how many people I would need to approach to reach my goal. When I was rejected, it didn't hurt as much because I knew that it was normal for 'x' amount of people to not be interested in what I was selling. Also, practice made it easier--the more I put myself out there, the less it hurt when I didn't get the results I wanted. It took me a few years before I felt comfortable with it, so you are normal in feeling upset. I have a friend from college who has successfully published a series of books and she may be a good mentor. Let me know if you'd like her contact information.
ReplyDeleteI don't have a good mechanism--I've just been rejected enough that it doesn't sting so bad any more. Most writers have. I know of some big writers (like Shannon Hale) who show the immense stacks of rejection letters they got along the way. The only thing that helps me is to keep going. Keep trying. I know it's hard, but the right fit will come. I have not yet tried self-publishing, but I know a lot of really good authors who have and they will never go back to traditional publishing. You might look into that as well. Your books are good, Tamara. They will find a home.
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